How to find a girlfriend - 6 invaluable tips

Years pass, cities and countries, phone numbers, jobs and companies change, and along with all these changes, very important people - good friends - leave our lives.

Sometimes we are to blame for having offended a good friend for a long time or deliberately moved away from her when entering into a relationship with a man. Sometimes time takes away girlfriends - they themselves get married, concentrate on the family and pay less and less attention to the “women’s gatherings”. And sometimes views differ - one friend freezes in her youth, wants to try everything and be in time everywhere, while the other sits as a house flower at home, regularly goes to work and dreams of her betrothed.

Yes, losing your beloved girlfriends is very difficult, whatever the reason for this. And with age it becomes even more difficult, because there are no schools, universities, courtyard companies and camps, where we used to make new acquaintances so easily. The loss of friends in adulthood threatens to remain lonely even if you have a family - there is no one to invite to visit with the child, so that the children are distracted and you drank tea. There is no one to share the joy of a leather wedding with, no one to remember the past with, and ignite at the age of 30 in a nightclub.

Unfortunately, the departure of friends happens everywhere and cannot be avoided, however, we can make another attempt to find a real friend on our way, and we will talk about this in this article.

Psychological moments

1. Why do I need a girlfriend? I must note the fact that many girls need a girlfriend only because it is right and accepted in society, and if you have no friends, you are an introverted and boring person. So for the time being, I also thought, and then I realized that I just had a moral leap and I was quite enough for full-fledged communication, gossip and the happiness of my husband (this is such an introvert). Therefore, do not be complex and do not try to keep up with the stereotypes of society - if you feel comfortable alone, you should not force events and try to find artificial friendship on your head.

If your craving for a friend is provoked by boredom, melancholy, a desire to share purely female wisdom, frame men together, go to the store for clothes - here some are not limited to a guy or a personal diary, in which case you really should surround yourself with interesting people to emotionally nourish ...

2. Why don't I have a girlfriend? Before building new friendships, you must eliminate old reasons why your environment has shrunk. This will help you work on yourself and learn how to quickly make friends, maintain new connections. My sister could not find friends, for example, due to excessive suspicion, secrecy and shyness. Few people like absolute quiet people with whom talking about sexual topics is taboo, and in order to get them out for a walk, you need to present a good reason, for example, your birthday. My ex-best friend also had a specific character, which is why she eventually lost all her friends - she was vindictive, unfriendly, gloomy, quarrelsome, and sometimes she also lied. If you also have such traits, you will have to eradicate them and begin to be courteous, helpful people, to show concern and interest in someone else's life.

3. How to choose? There is another reason for the absence of a best friend - there are just a lot of people around, and you still haven't found your friendly soul mate. If this is due to a thirst for popularity and attention, then it is unlikely that you will be able to give preference to several people. In general, such a moment is harmful, because people tend to be near "star" persons, as well as with the rich and influential, solely because of connections, rays of glory and attention. A maid of honor a priori will not be able to become a good friend to you, since she will never speak across your word, will not stimulate development and guard against mistakes. A real friend must have her own opinion, personal space and brains on her shoulders.

Let's go to practice

It will be hard for us in battle, because it is easy to say “Go and find your best friend”, but in fact it is given with great difficulty and personal concessions. So where to find a girlfriend? There are several points that will help create the opportunity to meet your friendly "half", and then everything will depend on you - whether to develop and feed the relationship, or abandon another friend and eventually disperse in different directions.

1. We learn to be friends with ourselves, to be an inquisitive and interesting person, we are not afraid to share ideas and offer help.

2. We remove all possible fears that block attempts to make friends. In my case, it was the fear of making friends with people of a different age, the fear of trusting. You may have a fear of betrayal (for example, against the background of an ex-girlfriend's betrayal with your boyfriend) or misunderstanding (a friend did not forgive how you responded about her new hairstyle). First of all, do not be afraid of new relationships, communication.

3. Working on non-verbal communication methods. Active, smiling, restless and helpful girls are noticed much faster in a new group than closed and boring ones who do not participate in discussions and work.

4. We learn not only to receive attention, but also to give. When you happen to meet a good person, do not wait for her to take the initiative to invite you somewhere. Yes, perhaps your future best friend even forgot about your existence, turning in her own affairs, you need to be ready for this in adulthood. Do not hesitate to call yourself, invite the girl to visit or go shopping together, answer her every awkward step with your confident. Think she might be scared of making new acquaintances, too.

5. Who is looking for - he will find, which means we do not expect that a friend to fall on our head while we are sitting in front of our computer. You need to live an active life, go to libraries, cafes, gyms, swimming pools, dance schools, sign up for yoga and themed evenings. At the same time, willingly visit your friends and colleagues, do not miss corporate parties, team buildings, and other events. In friendship, as in love, you cannot know in advance where and when you will meet “your” person. If you are a completely introverted person and are not used to meeting "on the street", try to find a girlfriend on the Internet. Now this method has become even more popular, especially for people who have arrived in new unfamiliar cities, as well as for mothers and careerists who have lost all their friends. Find suitable groups and sites, chat in chats and get used to each other, and then, under good circumstances, you can go to a personal meeting.

6. New is well forgotten old, so you should pay attention to old childhood friends with whom time and forgotten conflicts divorced you. Thanks to the Internet, you can start with unobtrusive communication, and shared memories may do the trick, and you will be happy to remember why you valued each other so much in your time.

Here is a small selection of very simple tips on how to find a best friend that can help you take the first steps towards a strong new friendship for years to come. Good luck in your search and long-term friendship!