How to find friends in life: overcoming shyness together! Tips to help you make new acquaintances easily Where to make new friends for middle-aged people

Memories of childhood are most often filled with positive emotions. This happens for many reasons. One of them is a huge number of friends, comrades and just acquaintances from peers. It was really easy to make friends in kindergarten or school. But a person grows up, and with age comes enormous difficulties when creating new ones. friendly relations. To find friends as an adult, you need to know the right places. We'll tell you about them.

Friendship for an adult: is it necessary?

But first, let's touch on the question of why an adult might need friends. There are many who consider friendship only as part of the lives of children, teenagers, boys and girls. For some reason, an opinion has formed that an adult cannot have friends, and should not. Especially if friendships from a young age have not been preserved. This approach cannot be called correct, since close people are definitely needed. And we are not talking about relatives or spouses.

Friends are needed for the reason that it is much easier to establish closer contact with them. After all, you are not connected by love relationships, common everyday life, blood relationships, and so on. This is a voluntary decision, which makes it much easier to open up to friends. And spending time together with them turns out to be easier, richer, more frank. In general, there is no doubt that an adult needs friends. All that remains is to find them.

Where is the easiest way to find friends as an adult?

It would seem that finding friends is problematic for an adult, since he devotes a lot of time to family, work, hobbies, and so on. In fact, an adult has much wider opportunities for finding friends, because his life is more eventful than that of a child. Where can I find my comrades?

1. Bring up old connections

An option that is often doomed to fail, but can still be very useful. Remember who you once had a good relationship. Finding this person is not a problem at all. At a minimum, there are social networks. There is always a possibility that he, too, will be glad to meet you after a long separation. And, who knows, maybe your friendship will reach a new level and become even more interesting than before.

2. Find friends at work

An obvious solution that very often leads to success. Friends from work are, of course, different from those you might find elsewhere. But there is no need to come up with common themes with them. Friendship between colleagues most often begins with a discussion of work. But, if you manage to get along with a person, you will soon discover him in a new way. After all, people behave in one way in the workplace, and in a completely different way outside of it. You just need to give the person a chance to open up and, accordingly, also receive a similar limit of trust from him.

3. Take advantage of your own hobby

Another potential source of friends is your hobbies. If you love sports, are interested in collective sports games, love collecting, are interested in music, and so on, you will always find like-minded people.

As in the previous case, friendship here develops from an initial common topic that is interesting to both. But, again, knowledge about each other needs to be expanded. After all, talking about sports or collecting stamps will not get you very far. In this situation, common interest is just a reason to spend time together. But friendship will be formed only after you go beyond these boundaries and understand what else connects you.

4. Visit relatives more often

It would seem, how can meetings with relatives help you find friends? Everything is very simple here. After all, relatives also have friends who can spend time with them. Family ties will turn out to be very useful, since, so to speak, they “will not get rid of you.” You will still have to meet on holidays, for some important events. If relatives also invite their acquaintances, colleagues, and so on, you will have a chance to expand your circle of potential friends.

On the other hand, making friends with family friends is not so easy, since they will always be aware of the events of the whole family. But if the person is tactful and smart, this may even benefit your relationship.

5. The connecting power of the Internet

Where do all the people live at the moment? Naturally, this is the Internet. Its huge advantage is that people there are not shy and make contact with strangers much easier. The easiest way to find friends is through social networks, using communities and public pages dedicated to your favorite topic or the city in which you live. The only condition is that the group must have the ability to comment. Be active, insert your “two cents” into discussions, then you will definitely be noticed. Just be careful, because the Internet is also a very fertile environment for scammers. Before establishing close contact with someone, make sure that the person is adequate, does not demand anything from you, and is truly interested in communication.

6. Any public places

Finally, you should visit crowded places as often as possible. Parks, cinemas, various eateries, shopping centers– how to know where you will meet interesting person. The only problem is that starting communication in public places is much more difficult than in all the previously listed cases. But the choice is huge, so there is definitely a chance of finding a friend.

We did not reveal any secrets about where to find a friend for an adult. You probably understand everything described yourself. Then the question is - why not use such opportunities? Those who are active, make contact, and are not afraid of new things have many friends. If you take the initiative, you will very soon find new true friends.

Friendship and adults are the most useful combination

It is clear that finding friends at a conscious age is problematic, since the requirements are quite high and there is no free time. But think about the positives. For example, friendships between adults can be rich in interesting events. In addition, in mature and smart person you will find a lot of useful things for yourself. Friendship between adults allows both to develop, to find more meaning in existence, and also a wonderful outlet with which to relieve anxiety and stress.

True friendship is perhaps the most amazing type of relationship between people. Just think about it: two complete strangers meet and, based only on emotional closeness, become each other’s reliable support and support in any life situations. Any of us can probably give many examples when friendships between people became much stronger than love or even family ones. But where does the need for such connections arise in a person and how to find new friends in life?

Answering this question, it is immediately worth noting that the need for friendly relations is entirely determined by the social essence of a person. To put it differently, it is extremely important for each of us to feel involved in society and maintain a connection with it. This is achieved by establishing friendly relations with other people. Otherwise, a person begins to feel a constant feeling of isolation and loneliness, which often prevents him from feeling truly happy. It’s not for nothing that popular wisdom says: “Don’t have a hundred rubles, but have a hundred friends.”

It should be noted that in childhood and adolescence, the establishment of friendly relations is very natural and spontaneous. And this is not surprising, because at this age a person’s social circle is constantly updated: kindergarten, school, university. At each of these stages, completely new people come into a person’s life, among whom he finds friends.

At older ages the situation is somewhat different. Here, of course, the main limitation is imposed by work: a person has much less free time, activity and mobility decrease, as a result of which the circle of friends gradually narrows, without being updated in any way. What to do in such a situation? How to expand your social circle and how to find new friends in life?

There are many places where an adult can find friends:

Job. This is the easiest place for an adult to find friends, since this is where he spends most of his time. Try to take a closer look at your work colleagues. Perhaps among them there will be people close to you in spirit, with whom you will be interested in spending time not only in a formal setting. In addition, friendship with work colleagues has many advantages. A friendly relationship with one of the members of the work team can significantly increase the psychological comfort of your stay at the workplace. After all, it’s one thing to go to work simply to earn money, and quite another to also socialize with friends. This way you can “combine business with pleasure.” In addition, you will always have something to talk about with a work colleague, because you spend most of your time in the same place with the same people. This often plays out quite important role in communication.
Places where people with similar interests gather. It's no secret that it is common interests that most often unite people. If you have a passion or hobby, think about where you can meet like-minded people and go there. For example, if you have a passion for embroidery, it is very likely that it will not be difficult for you to find a new friend or girlfriend in a needlework club. In addition, you may share similar life circumstances with some people, for example, the birth of a child. After all, it will certainly be interesting for a young mother to communicate with other “beginning” parents. Here, a children's playground or amusement park can be a great place to get acquainted.
Social networks and dating sites. Many people will certainly be very skeptical about this method of finding new friends and acquaintances. This may be due to either periodic cases of Internet fraud or simply a lack of personal contact with the interlocutor. However, you should not immediately rule out this option of dating, because, in addition to its disadvantages, it also has a number of advantages. For example, it will be much easier for an overly shy and shy person to find a new friend in social network than in any other place that involves personal communication. In addition, acquaintance and further communication on the Internet can significantly save a very important resource of a modern person - time. After all, many will agree that sometimes after work it can be extremely difficult to find a minute for your favorite hobby, not to mention going somewhere. Communication on a social network does not tie a person to any specific time: he can “send news” to his friend when it is convenient for him.
Volunteer and community organizations are another good opportunity to make new friends in life. Surely, there is some socially important problem that worries you very much. By joining a public organization dedicated to solving this problem, you will not only make your contribution to a good cause, but you will also probably meet people who have life goals similar to yours. After all, it is well known that nothing can unite people more than a common idea. Special attention Volunteer organizations that can, for example, help orphans, the disabled or the elderly deserve help here. By joining the ranks of selfless volunteers, you not only get the opportunity to significantly expand your social circle with understanding and sympathetic people, but also to help those in need with a good deed. And this, in turn, will significantly contribute to your self-realization outside of your career. It should also be noted that relationships between members of such organizations are initially formed in a friendly atmosphere, which has a positive effect on their further development.
Neighboring apartments. Modern life such is that sometimes people do not even know their closest neighbors in an apartment building. And it’s a shame! After all, no matter how trivial it may sound, sometimes all you need to do is knock on the next door to meet a friend for life. In addition, we must not forget that friendship with neighbors is not only pleasant, but also very convenient. Firstly, your friend is almost always nearby, in the literal sense of the word. And if you want to urgently meet with him, it will only take a few minutes. Secondly, when you are away, for example on holiday, your pet or houseplants They definitely won't be left unattended. So friendship with a neighbor can bring not only a lot of positive emotions, but also enormous purely practical benefits.
Sports sections, training courses. Everyone is familiar with the proverb: “Live forever, learn forever.” This means that work is not a reason to put an end to your education. And if you have long dreamed of learning something, be it dancing, playing volleyball or sewing, then now is the time. What does this have to do with making new friends? The most direct! Attending courses or a sports section will give you the opportunity to meet a huge number of new people, among whom there will probably be someone with whom you will be interested in communicating and hanging out. free time.
Excursion tour. If you love to travel and discover new horizons in the truest sense of the word, then this method is perfect for you. A long trip to another country or city guarantees that you will spend most of this time in the company of people you have never known before. Isn't this a great opportunity to expand your social circle a little? Moreover, the very atmosphere of travel will contribute to this in the best possible way.

So, there are quite a few places where an adult can find new friends. However, do not forget that no matter which way you choose to find new friends in life, the main thing in this matter is to show a sincerely positive and friendly attitude towards others.

Do you know the feeling universal loneliness that visits even after the most happy parties and long conversations with friends? If so, then most likely you lack real friends in front of whom you can be as you are without fear of seeming weak or mediocre. The problem is that as you age, making friends becomes more difficult - or so it is commonly believed. Laura Yang found out from experts why many adults feel lonely and how to make friends at any age.

Kira Asatryan

It is possible to identify both external and internal blocks that hinder friendly relations. External ones can include the lack of free time. In their 30s and 40s, people face significant responsibilities like raising children and caring for aging parents. In other words, in adulthood there is simply not enough time to look for new friends and build relationships with them. Another important external factor is place of residence. Unlike college or university students, people in their 30s and 40s are more likely to live with family or alone. Communes (dormitories, for example) promote the development of friendships and social activity in general. But adults have little choice of where to live, so they need to look for friends outside the home.

Internal blocks are generally more complex and dictated largely by cultural norms, but they are just as strong as external ones. For example, many of us believe that in order to be successful, we must have all the friends we need by age 30 or 40. If we feel lonely in the middle of life, most often this is regarded as a personal failure. This harmful belief causes shame, which prevents us from making friends. The hope is that such cultural norms will begin to change, especially as a growing body of research shows that midlife is the loneliest time for most of us. It shouldn’t be this way, because intimacy is equally possible at any age, and external and internal blocks can be overcome.

In childhood and adolescence, friendship seemed something automatic: we talked during breaks, were in the same squad at camp, played on the same streets and lived in the same university dormitories. But that's not true. Friendships happened because of consistency: we played in the yard with the same group, slept in shared bedrooms in the camp, and living in a dorm was cheaper than renting an apartment. Sharing time together was what was automatic, not friendship.

So if friends are harder to make as adults, it's because we have to prioritize seeing specific people. Yes, we can assume that we are becoming selective, we have more stress, or that we need to communicate with people with whom there is a certain overlap in their views on life. But in fact, even despite all these circumstances and restrictions, we can become friends - if we spend time together. A large number of studies show that we are mistaken when we believe that only a person with interests close to us can become a friend. It could be someone who regularly spends time with us. We become attached to those with whom we see often and periodically - that's why we sometimes become friends with colleagues with whom we would not otherwise become friends.

Consistency is one of the requirements of a healthy relationship, which not every adult can do, because in order to have a reason to see each other often, you must already have some kind of intimacy. There are two ways out: initiate and create conditions for constant communication or join some organization where such constancy is already ensured, for example, a church, some kind of club of interests, coworking, etc. When we join such organizations, we have There will already be a regular schedule of meetings and a chance to build relationships that can then work outside of this enterprise. But if you don’t like diverse meetings, you will have to take the initiative into your own hands and seek meetings on your own. Moreover, constantly, because friendship cannot exist without regular communication. We may enjoy spending time together, but if we don't communicate often, friendships won't develop. The key to building friendships is making time for the person.

Geoffrey Grief

Professor at the Maryland School of Social Work, author of The Buddy System: Understanding Male Friendships

According to Aristotle, to become a true friend, you need to know a person for some time. By this logic, the friends you made at a young age and who knew you as you grew and developed - the only people who know you well. In youth and early adulthood, friends are not so important because then a person pays more attention to his partner, family and work. But later, when work becomes easier, and the children do not want our presence in their lives, friends become necessary.

When friends start to die or grow apart, we may feel like we'll never be able to make the same friends as we did in school, or that we've simply lost all the necessary social skills. Friendship requires emotional effort, sometimes even physical effort. As you age, making such efforts may be more difficult - but no less important. It must be remembered that new friends can appear regardless of our age. People with friends are happier, healthier and even live longer.

I think a big part of it is that many adults don't give themselves the opportunity to make new friends. The life of an adult is often built according to the “home-work-home” scenario. If they do anything outside the home, it is something they do together with their partner, family or old friends. It’s different for children: most of them are involved in various activities such as a sports section, choir, theater group, where there is a chance to meet new people. If a child does not have extracurricular activities, there is still a greater chance of making new acquaintances, if only because the people in classes, schools and universities are not always the same. So when a client comes to me as a coach who is interested in this topic, I ask how they spend their free time. If it's not somewhere where there's an opportunity to meet people, I try to gently encourage them to start meeting a group of people once or twice a week.

In most cases, such simple tactics are enough, but that’s not all. After all, many people actively try to make friends and fail. I think because as we age we learn to hide our true feelings, emotions and thoughts. When I was a child, I told my friends my secrets, I would cry in front of them if I felt sad or sad. I wasn't afraid to call someone my best friend and let the person know that they meant a lot to me. But as I got older, I learned to build barriers. I realized that people can reject me, that secrets are sometimes blurted out. And putting a refined version of yourself on display is not so scary, because there is less risk of being rejected or getting into an awkward situation. And it’s easier to go to parties and have fun with your filtered “I” - however, then you have to go home and feel lonely there because no one knows the real me.

Don't get me wrong, everyone needs to build walls around themselves from time to time. You may not want to tell your deepest secrets to your friends, you may not want to cry in front of a boss who harshly criticizes your work. Part of maturity is the ability to build these walls. But even the strongest castles had gates - otherwise people would starve in them. The imaginary walls around themselves should also have gates that would open for those people we choose. This is exactly what many adults forget: we often either close ourselves off from everyone or open up to everyone, even people who are not trustworthy. This is the reason why it is more difficult for adults to make friends.

The main thing I would advise to those who want to make friends is to become a friend to at least one person. Show him that you are someone you can open up to without fear, that you are truly interested in his personality, and that you will not reject or betray him. Let him gradually open up to you, don’t push him and symmetrically begin to trust yourself. If you do this (no matter how old you are), I think you'll find that making friends isn't that hard.

Many people experience a common social problem: they don't know exactly how to make friends and organize their social life.

There are several reasons why you might find yourself in this situation.

You moved to new town, and so far the circle of your acquaintances is very narrow.
You've been in a relationship with a girl for a long time and have let your social life fade away.
Your old friends left your life naturally (they moved on, became busy with their family, etc.), but you did not find a replacement for them.
A significant part of your circle disappeared overnight, like many who graduated from an educational institution and stopped living in the city of study.
You feel that your personal level has become much higher than that of your current friends, and you want to “upgrade” your environment.
Previously, it was enough for you to have one friend, but now you are determined to expand your social circle.
You never knew how to make friends and always wanted to improve your social life.
Significant changes have occurred in your life, for example, you decided to no longer drink alcohol, and you need to change your environment, because people who were once close to your interests are no longer suitable for you.

Step 1. Identify potential friends

To expand your circle of friends, you need to first identify possible candidates. There are two main ways to do this.

Identify your current contacts

This doesn't apply to you if you just moved to a new area where you don't know anyone.

Typically, you already have a certain level of social connections.

You don't have to go out and meet ten strangers. It is often easier to turn existing contacts of unfamiliar people into full-fledged friends than to involve completely new faces in your life.

Most likely, there are already several people you know in your circle who can become a closer part of your new social circle.

These are people like:

People you meet every day, for example, on your way to work, while shopping, etc.
Your colleagues or fellow students with whom you have managed to establish contact.
Friends of acquaintances whom you have previously met.
The initiators of friendship with you, to whose proposal you were once indifferent.
People you cross paths with often, but have so far been separated by social distance.
Friends with whom you once lost contact, but you have the power to return everything to its previous course.
Acquaintances with whom you have not previously communicated due to a significant age difference.

Meet new people

Enhancing your current social connections can be a long process.

But sometimes you're at a point in your life where you need to meet completely new people.

For many people, a significant barrier to expanding their social circle is the lack of direct access to potential new friends.

The most obvious sources for making new contacts are:

Visit various communities of interest, where you are sure to meet many people who already have something in common with you. It is best if the community's activities are related to communication. This should also include attending various courses, trainings, lectures, reading rooms, sports sections, dance schools, etc.
Meet people through your school or job. By seeing the same faces every day, you can gradually get to know them better without falling under social pressure.
Develop relationships with friends of your friends.

Meeting new people will certainly require you to put in extra effort to break out of your daily routine.

The most effective way finding friends is leading a full, interesting, eventful life, side effect which will be the intersection of your life path with a lot of new people.

When new people start appearing around you, you should start communicating with them and try to get to know them better.

Not everyone you interact with will become your friend, but engaging enough people in your social circle will allow you to develop friendships with some of them.

And anyway, why would you try to be friends with everyone?

Formula of friendship

The environment brings you together
It's easier to make friends among the people you meet in educational institution, at work or in some community of interests. This seems like the context that allows a friendship to begin.
This is why you can't just meet someone by walking up to them on the street. You need a context that brings you together.
The right situation
This means that you and the other person have the time, energy, and desire to invest in a new friendship.
This also means that you both have the opportunity to develop a friendship. If one of you is planning to move to another city, what's the point in trying to develop your friendship?
Successful first communication
Your first interaction is very important because it determines the level of comfort and trust, allowing you to establish that each of you can be pleasant company for the other.
It also serves other functions such as relaxation, entertainment and building rapport.
You must be sociable and responsive
To make friends, you need to keep the conversation going and show interest in the person you're talking to and the topics being discussed.
If either of you gives curmudgeonly answers and shows little interest in the other's opinions, behavior and mood, then you will not have a strong foundation on which to develop a friendship.
Common characteristics with another person
One of the most important prerequisites for finding friends is the presence of common interests and similarities of opinions, hobbies, habits or activities.
The more you find in common with another person, the easier it will be for you to establish a friendly relationship with him.
Basic trust in each other
This means that both you and the other person you meet are involved in the process of disclosing personal information to each other.
You start with very neutral personal information and then go deeper as the level of trust grows.

Step 2. Invite potential friends to do something together

Once you've met people you're interested in hanging out with, invite them to meet again outside of your meeting place. This is the most important step you can take to make friends.

You can meet a huge number of people, but if you don't take action to develop acquaintances, these people will remain just temporary passengers on the train of your life.

This seems obvious, but single people often fall into this trap.

Perhaps someone is constantly telling them funny stories at work, or starts a conversation at university, but they don't take steps to suggest meeting in a different setting and developing communication.

It will be strange at first to try to take the initiative because there is always the possibility of rejection, but it is quite easy to get used to.

Depending on the conditions of your acquaintance, you can quickly begin to transfer new people to friend status, or you will have to wait some time, for example several weeks.

Get into the habit of exchanging contacts

Exchange contacts with people is very useful.

You may meet an interesting person, but you will never know when you will see him next.

So exchange phone numbers or become friends on social networks.

This way, if the opportunity or need to get together arises, you can easily contact them.

In addition, if your new acquaintances have your contact information, they, in turn, will also be able to invite you to some event.

Don't decline offers

Of course, your own plans are important, but if someone offers to spend time with you, try to accept the offer.

This doesn't mean you have to agree all the time. For example, if the proposed activity is outside your comfort zone, or you have an exam on the scheduled day, then your refusal will be completely appropriate.

However, if you are only slightly unsure, it is better to agree. Why give up the opportunity to get out of the house with a group of people?

Once you have more friends and different competing options, you can become more picky.

If you're a shyer or lonely person, you tend to conclude that the meeting won't be that much fun and you shouldn't go.

Try to push away these thoughts and go anyway. You're often not sure how enjoyable something can be until you see it with your own eyes.

Sometimes you will have to inconvenience yourself for the sake of your social life.

You might be invited to a movie you're not interested in, or someone might call you and ask you to meet on a Friday night when you're about to go to bed.

You will often have to make compromises, but the prospect of a rich social life is worth these minor inconveniences.

Another thing you should consider is this. Many people will stop inviting you if you constantly refuse.

Your friends may have nothing against you, but the next time an event is planned, the thought will arise: “He always refuses my invitations, so there is no point in calling him this time.”

Step 3. Maintain and develop friendships

It's not that difficult to chat with someone once in your life or to do it from time to time.

However, to develop closer friendships, you need to maintain constant communication, spend time together, share emotions and get to know each other on a deeper level.

You won't be able to find a friend in every person, but over time you will be able to build close relationships with some people.

Once you find friends, lean on them to expand your social circle.

Once you have one or two friends, consider that you have laid the groundwork for expanding your social connections.

If you are not very social by nature, one or two good friends may be all you need to be quite happy with the company around you.

But sooner or later you will meet your friend's friends, with whom you can also establish friendly relations.

Thanks to friends, it will be easier for you to meet completely new people, because together with your group you will be able to visit various events and expand your circle of friends.

Step 4. Behave well with your friends

Be positive and don't spread negativity

While it's natural to share your problems, if you constantly complain and have a generally negative attitude towards others and life in general, then people will get tired of your whining and negativity.

Everyone has enough problems in life, and no one needs the additional tons of unpleasant experiences that you decided to bestow on others.

Nevertheless, good friend will always listen to you when you need it, so don’t take the information voiced as “never complain to anyone.”

Be full of energy and share more positive emotions.

Become an attentive listener

Don't make the mistake of deliberately turning communication into your solo performance.

If your interlocutor wants to speak, be sure to listen carefully.

Do interesting things

If you're excited about life, have interesting hobbies, improve, create, explore, get new experiences, meet new people, you can become a magnet for others, and your life itself will reach a new level.

Smile

Don't smile all the time or at the wrong time. Other times, your genuine smile will make you more attractive and personable.

Keep calm

And while it's great to have a lot of energy, people who are overly dramatic and unreasonably impulsive can push other people away.

Therefore, learn to react to most problems calmly, trying not to increase their scale to the level of a universal tragedy.

Be yourself, don't brag

Don't try to impress people all the time. If you are confident in yourself, you don't need this at all.

Don't try to appear better than you really are, especially when your behavior is for show.

Be confident and happy with yourself

Be happy with who you are and even your flaws. People don't like other people with low self-esteem.

Learn to see the positive aspects of yourself, your sincere heart and your perfect nature. Let this become the story you tell yourself.

Step 5. Do the above steps often

If you introduced two friends into your social circle and stopped there, it is unlikely that your social connections will continue to expand on their own.

Once you constantly try new ways to meet people and attend different events, you will have a ton of friends and acquaintances.

You don't have to have an infinite number of friends. Many people are perfectly happy maintaining only a few very close friendships.

However, if the current state of affairs does not suit you, you know how to find friends.

You have to make an effort

Your personal initiative is the most important principle in building friendly relations.

A big mistake is to be in a state of passive waiting and hope for the breath of fate. Of course, it would be great if this happens, but you shouldn’t count on it too much.

If you are wondering how to find friends, then the first thing you will have to do is to put in enough effort to do so.

If you're looking to have fun this weekend, don't think it'll just happen. Reach out to people you know and come up with an idea to do something together, or find out what they will be doing and join them.

Finding friends is actually not difficult

If you don't have enough experience in making new contacts, the process may seem more complicated and drawn out than it actually is.

Often all you have to do to find friends is meet people and spend some time with them.

You don't have to know them for a few months before making them friends.

Of course, if you have just met someone, at first your relationship will be somewhat superficial, but not much time will pass and you can safely consider yourself friends.

Don't be too picky at the beginning

If you're single, your initial goal should be to create at least some social life. Undoubtedly, avoid truly negative and unnecessary personalities for your destiny.

But if you meet an interesting person who doesn't seem like the ideal candidate for a true friend at first, give him a chance. The benefits of communication, as opposed to loneliness, must outweigh the fact of imperfection.

Additionally, if you're just starting to form your social circle, you're probably not fully aware of what you want to see in other people.

If you get along more or less with someone, develop a closer relationship with them, and later decide whether you should become friends.

Even if at the very beginning new company led your mind into a dead end of bewilderment, over time everything can change.

Lonely people tend to have more negative attitudes towards others. And if you notice similar attitudes towards others in yourself, it is important for you to make an effort to consciously change your behavior.

Be persistent

Sometimes you join some company or meet your friend's friends and hope to meet a large number of new wonderful people.

But once you find yourself in a new society, you begin to feel out of place. You may feel like you are unable to communicate with anyone or as if you are being ignored.

Make a few more attempts, make a few more meetings, because when you meet for the first time, natural social restrictions and some enslavement arise. Over time, the warmth of friendly relations will warm the ice of misunderstanding at the first stage of communication.

If someone turns down your offer because they're busy, don't worry. Please try again another time.

Don't assume that you are being treated with disdain. The very fact of the initiative shown will work for you in the future, when your friend may need company.

When you meet new people, you need to be realistic about your importance in their lives, and you should consider that you won't become friends overnight.

They probably already have their own social circle, and their world won't end unless you become part of that circle.

Therefore, be neutral about their behavior and reaction to the proposal to spend time together, because people can really be busy.

Just keep meeting other people and expand your social connections.

Patience

You can often get your social life back on track quite quickly, for example if you've just moved to a new city to go to university or you've joined a football team. In other cases, it will take longer to find friends.

It will take some time to find the right people for you. After this, it may take several months before you feel like you have a friend.

But don't forget that friendship is part of interpersonal relationships, which do not always lend themselves to rules and logic, so go towards your goal, but do not discount spontaneity.

In conclusion. About friendship

Benefits of having friends

Improved mood
Free time spent with happy and positive friends improves your mood and even appearance.
Help you achieve your goals
Encouraging your ideas from friends helps boost your willpower and increase your chances of success.
Reduced likelihood of stress and depression
Having an active social life strengthens your immune system and, by eliminating isolation from the outside world, eliminates factors.
Support in difficult times
Friends can help you cope with a serious illness, the loss of a job or a loved one, or any other problems in life, especially if you just need to share your worries with someone.
Increased self-esteem
Feeling needed by your friends adds meaning to your life.

To understand that a person is worthy of your friendship, ask yourself questions

Do I feel better after spending time with this person?
Do I want to share my thoughts with him?
Do I feel safe, free and relaxed in his company, or do I feel like I need to watch my words and actions?
Does he support me and treat me with respect?
Can I trust him?

To know if a person is interested in being friends with you, ask yourself

Does he ask you questions about you, as if he wants to get to know you better?
Does he tell you about himself beyond making superficial conversations?
Does he give you his full attention when you see him?
Is he interested in exchanging contact information or making plans to spend time together or work together?